BreakPoint: Fur Babies

Pets, Children, and the Triumph of Autonomy

I’m gonna get a lot of email about this commentary, so let me say this up front: I like animals. And pets are wonderful things. But. . . .

In her 1992 novel, “The Children of Men,” P. D. James told the story of a world where it has been 25 years since the last child was born. In this dying world, kittens and puppies are pushed around in prams and receive the treatment previously afforded to human infants.

Twenty-five years later, it seems that life is imitating art, though in James’s novel, childlessness was the result of a mysterious and catastrophic collapse in male fertility. Today, it’s the result of people’s choices. But in both James’ dystopia and today’s celebration of personal autonomy, the result is the same: Animals have become substitutes for actual children.

This substitution was the subject of a recent article by Bradley Mattes of the Life Issues Institute. In it, Mattes told readers that “according to government statistics, an increasing number of women from the millennial generation are opting out when it comes to having babies.”

“Instead,” Mattes continues, “it appears they’re finding an alternative more to their liking.” That “alternative” is what might be called “pet parenthood” and its substitute progeny, “fur babies.”

What’s more, many millennials are approaching pet ownership the way previous generations approached first-time parenthood: preparing “for their impending bundle of joy by reading books and consuming other available research.”

Now the obvious question is “Why?” Several people Mattes quotes help us answer that question. One thirty-year-old told the New York Post that “It’s just less work and, honestly, I have more time to go out.”

Another thirty-year-old, writing in Charlotte Magazine, wrote about how she went from wanting to be a stay-at-home mom to a pet parent. In her words, pets “give us a greater purpose without making our lives mainly about theirs.”

While there is something “stunning” about such “self-centered transparency,” as Mattes put it, we shouldn’t be surprised. It’s the logical outcome of the triumph of personal autonomy in the West. We exist for our own benefit and pleasure, as do our children and our pets.

Whereas having children was historically thought of an as act of obedience to a divine command, an obligation we owed past and future generations, today it’s an act of self-fulfillment. Children are now a means to an end, not ends in and of themselves.

For many, having a child is just another bucket-list item; something we do (or don’t do) to “complete” our lives, preferably after we’ve experienced the other things we believe make for a “complete” life, like a successful career and travel, etc.

The problem with this idea is, with kids, the “feel good” phase passes pretty quickly, and is replaced by a long, hard slog of raising them with all the sacrifice that entails. If you get struck by the travel bug, you just can’t board your kids at a local kennel.

Now if you’re a Christian, this shouldn’t be a problem. We get—or at least we should get—concepts like “obligation” and “self-sacrifice” and “self-giving.” But if what matters most are our “needs” and desires, pets can sound like a preferable alternative to children.

After all, as one person quoted by Mattes put it, “Who needs children when research has shown that certain hormones that increase when we cuddle children also increase when we cuddle our pets?”

So get your fix of oxytocin, the “cuddle hormone,” and you still get to live however you want. What’s the problem with that?

The problem is there’s literally no future in a world of “fur babies.” The England of James’ novel is a hopeless dystopia, not a paradise. As the principle character writes in his diary, “without the hope of posterity, for our race if not for ourselves, without the assurance that we being dead yet live, all pleasures of the mind and senses sometimes seem to me no more than pathetic and crumbling defenses shored up against our ruins.”

This is where the enshrinement of autonomy and self-fulfillment will take us as a culture. It’s a dead, loveless end. And no amount of oxytocin or fur can change that fact.


Further Reading and Information

Fur Babies: Pets, Children, and the Triumph of Autonomy

Children are a gift from God. For information on the joys and responsibilities of having and raising children, check out the resources listed below.


Find a BreakPoint radio station in your area–Click here.


Many Millennials Choosing ‘Puppy Parenthood’
  • Bradley Mattes
  • Life Issues Institute
  • February 8, 2017
The eyes have it: Why we bond with our dogs like our babies
  • Meghan Holohan
  • July 29, 2016
Life's Value
  • Alan Jacobs
  • First Things
  • August 1993
Sacred Parenting: How Raising Children Shapes Our Souls
  • Gary L. Thomas
  • Zondervan Publishing Company
  • April 2005

Comment Policy: Commenters are welcome to argue all points of view, but they are asked to do it civilly and respectfully. Comments that call names, insult other people or groups, use profanity or obscenity, repeat the same points over and over, or make personal remarks about other commenters will be deleted. After multiple infractions, commenters may be banned.

  • Zarm

    Whatever complaints you may get by email or here, let me start this out with a positive comment. This is right on; a great, and necessary, message, and I appreciate your writing and publishing it.

    I’m 31 and a father of two; I’ve also been a cat-owner of three- Ellie (named after PIXAR’s Up), who we raised from a kitten and third-generation cat of my wife’s family… and the kitten brothers Kevin and Neil, who broke her poor little brain when they moved in with us. 🙁 (And they ended up being no picnic themselves, as my wife’s quivering rage at the third bag of shredded up groceries in a month could attest!) 😉

    We had our fair share of hard work; early in Ellie’s kittenhood, my wife actually went out and slept beside her to assuage her parent-separation anxiety. We had health scares, moments of discipline, treasured moments of laughter and joy, the aggravation of destroyed property (especially once the twins came into our lives); sample ups-and-downs of everything we’ve experienced since parenthood. Yet we also had beloved memories, experiences, companionship, affection, and cuddles in endless measure. We shared our lives with those funny little critters, and received everything a pet-owner could hope to in return.

    It frankly doesn’t compare. It’s not even close. Not in terms of the work put in- and not in terms of the rewards gained from it. The ‘cuddle fix’ doesn’t compare; the pride in a pet’s accomplishments can never match the pride in a son’s (or, I would imagine, a daughter’s- despite an eager desire for a little girl, we have not yet been so-blessed); the laughter in more frequent, and the constant source of wonder and amazement as they surprise you was never there with the cats. Even from a self-focused point of view, pethood never held a candle to parenthood. Even with the comparative ease, the far-lesser responsibility, it wouldn’t be remotely a worthwhile trade.

    Add to that the actual responsibility and legacy and way that God uses parenthood daily to teach us about our relationship with Him and convict us on the ways we behave toward Him,the obedience tot he Biblical command (and personal calling that we’ve felt to have both of our boys- even when, the second time, neither of us were sure at all that we were ready for another), and the already-compelling reasons of self-interest become just a small aspect of the absolute imperative that God calls us to. And yet, for all that, it is no less full of joy and rewards that- even understanding intellectually- we could never have *imagined* before we embarked on this journey. As Kelsey Grammer so wonderfully put it on Frasier, “You don’t just love your kids- you fall in love with them.”

    I know plenty of people who say ‘Our pet is our baby’- but what I really want them to know; anyone considering having a pet as an adequate substitute to having children to know- is that there really is no comparison. You’re saving trouble (in the same way you ‘save trouble’ working at a relationship by remaining single, or ‘save trouble’ of owning a home by living with parents all your life)- but just as in those situations, the lack of bother is a gain of near-infinitessimal smallness compared to the richness of the rewards you’re missing out on. And if you’re a believer- well, unless you’ve felt God’s conviction to skip out on parenting (and I believe He does appoint some not to have children, just as He appoints some not to get married), then you haven’t really been left that option. Not of your own volition; not unless He’s the one directing you that way.

    Either way, don’t be fooled; we love our pets, but it’s nothing compared to the way you will love your child. If you want to settle for the former, that’s your choice- but don’t buy into the lie that you’re getting anywhere *close* to what you would get form the latter. As someone who’s experienced both states, they can’t even begin to compare.

    • Jim Kinnebrew

      Amen! From the father of three grown sons and the master (or am I the slave?) of two beloved yorkies.

    • Gladys1071

      Well Parenting is not for everyone, and people should be free to make their own choices about this things, without others telling them what they should or should not do. The decison should be between the couple and God, and really nobody’s business. Not trying to be snarky, but everyone has to walk their own path before God, and should not be dictated by anyone.

      • Zarm

        I agree. I’m sorry if I sounded like I was saying otherwise. (My intended point was simply that, from either a self-focused/worldly OR objective perspective, pet-ownership can’t compare.) But I agree; parenthood is for whom God calls to it, and that’s not everyone.

        • Gladys1071

          No of course not, i would never compare pet ownership to having children. Though i chose to not have children. I would never consider a pet a substitute for children, i know their is an enormous difference, a pet you can give away and you don’t have to raise and teach them about God.

  • Peter Mead

    Let me suggest another reason why this dystopia is becoming more real. If salvation is more or less an instantaneous event–you pray the sinner’s pray and that’s about it–then why do we need the demands of parenthood? But if we walk a path of salvation for our entire lives, and if we are called to be parents, then parenthood makes more sense.

    • Gladys1071

      what does parenthood have to do with salvation? as far as i know we are saved by grace, not by our works, parent or not.

      • Peter Mead

        So you agree with Luther, who said that James is an “epistle of straw” and should be excised from the Bible?

        • Gladys1071

          so are you saying that being a parent is requirement for salvation? As far as i recall Paul was not a parent either. As far as the book of James, I have no opinion of it.

          • Peter Mead

            Okay, let’s sort some things out. First regarding parenthood — for some people, that’s part of their walk as Christians, for others, not. Whatever walk God has for you, that is your way of salvation. As regards salvation, you insisted that we are saved by grace, not by works. Yes, that’s in the Bible, but you can take it out of context and sow confusion. James said, “You see that (Abraham’s) faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did… As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.” Salvation is a process, not an event, a lifetime process. For many people, having children is part of the path of salvation that God gives them.

          • Gladys1071

            We are saved by grace, unless apostle Paul was a liar or completely mistaken. I see no confusion either we are saved by Jesus work on the Cross, for our sins are nailed with him, or we by our own righteousness which is not good enough for God’s standard is perfection, and Jesus met that standard. Martin Luther himself said, if we are not saved by Grace, than we are most sorry bunch because non can meet the standard of perfection that God requires.

          • Peter Mead

            You’re making the same confusion of so many others, insisting that it’s grace or works. You have totally ignored the scriptures from James that I posted. That’s how people got into this ridiculous situation of thinking they only need to pray the sinner’s prayer to get saved. We cooperate with the working of God’s grace, we show our love and faith to Him through obedience. Those are not “works” they are expressions of gratitude for saving grace. Do you do absolutely nothing all day because you don’t want to do any “works”?

          • Gladys1071

            I agree with everything that you say, my question is what does this have to do with Parenting?

          • Peter Mead

            If you believe that salvation is a process rather than a one-shot event, then our walk with God is all a part of salvation (some people differentiate and call that “sanctification” but I believe that is harmful). If it’s in God’s will for me to be a daddy, than that is a huge part of my process of salvation. Parenting calls me into account and sends me to my knees about as much as anything in my life, so I’d say it’s definitely part of God’s process of salvation for me (and I’m begging God that it’s part of salvation for my children, too).

          • Gladys1071

            ok, well i guess you are entitled to believe that. I am not sure i believe that salvation is a process. We all have to walk our own path with God, your path will be different than mine.

          • Gladys1071

            Do you think that you are able to meet the standard of righteousness that God requires to be saved? i do you think you can do that on your own?

  • Kathryn Danylko

    Right on, brother!

  • Gilda Vincent

    I cringe every time I hear the term “fur baby” and I always have.

  • maddawgg

    Maybe you should focus your attention on the untold number of children brought into this world because of religious sanctions on birth control and then left to starve and die. Or, how about the children of Syria who are being murdered by their own countrymen or drown and wash up on beaches when they try to flee the horror of their homeland. There are millions of children in need of food, clothing, a stable safe home and a chance at a somewhat normal life. Fur Babies and people who choose to live childless?, really? Is that all that gets your attention? If so, you have a very narrow view.

  • Lobanz D’Grate

    It’s true that selfishness is at least partially to blame. But so is feminism and control of reproduction is at the heart of modern feminism. The idea is that motherhood is a bondage unfairly put on women. It is a method by which the “patriarchy” subjugates them by keeping them pregnant and caring for youngsters. They can’t be standalone “equal” members of society if they are caring for children. This is the way they look at it — they say it over and over in their writings. Birth control and abortion are the two main remedies. Historically, this is the primary reason that modern methods of birth control and abortion were developed in the early 20th century. This is the reason birth control was mandatory in Obamacare — even for people who believe it’s wrong. This is why they make such a big deal over abortion. It is more about women’s “liberation” from children (and the Patriarchy) than it is about the morality of preventing or murdering babies.

    And they are right that women can’t be standalone “equal” members of society if they are caring for children. Single motherhood is very, very hard. Mothers need husbands to provide for them in order for them to care for their children. This is the natural created order and the one described and prescribed in the Bible. It is only in the modern world that technology has allowed birth control and abortion to be easy, painless, cheap, widespread, and low risk.

    The modern way of life often makes the Bible’s teachings seem irrelevant, unnecessary and backward. It takes vigilance to remain faithful to God’s intended patterns for life in a world that has thinks it has outgrown the Bible. It may take a several generations, but the Creator is always proven right.

    — Lobanz

    • Gladys1071

      The modern way of life often makes the Bible’s teachings seem irrelevant, unnecessary and backward.

      to some extent this is true. As a Christian that is married and chose not have children, birth control is very important for I also have to work outside the home. That is the reality of modern life. You can’t turn back time, it marches forward, and women need to be able to control their reproduction, it is not wrong or a sin to not have children. I think God is more understanding than we think. Would you agree in this day and age both husband and wife for the most part have to work? which makes child rearing more difficult. That is why i don’t believe the bible is a complete guide to everything, it was written in a different time where the custom was different in regards to women/working and childbearing.

      • Lobanz D’Grate

        I guess it all depends on whether you think we should examine our culture in the light of the Bible, or the Bible in the light of our culture.

        I do agree that the Bible isn’t the complete guide to everything. It simply explains how things ought to be. It doesn’t tell us what to do in all the bad situations that arise from deviating from its ideals.

        Culture is a very slippery and deceptive thing. It is our collective understanding of what “normal” is, i.e., “the reality of modern life”. It is what we are all brought up to believe is acceptable and good — our “worldview” as the Breakpoint Boys constantly harp on. The real question is how do you know if your worldview is correct? This is why we have a written, static, unchanging guidebook.

        And, no, I don’t believe that “in this day and age both husband and wife for the most part have to work”. It is just one of many false figments of our culture. I’ll give you this, though: the farther our culture deviates from the ideal, the harder it is for us to live according to that ideal. Is it difficult? Yes. Does it require sacrifice? Yes. But this difficulty, this struggle is a good and necessary thing that is “baked in” to life by design — it is what gives our faithfulness meaning.

        Hope that helps.

        — Lobanz

        • Gladys1071

          the problem is we live in a sinful world so we don’t live the ideal. As far as worldview, any worldview is going to be distorted to some extent for we are imperfect human beings. All we can do is live the best we can before God in these modern times, that is what i strive to do, though i accept that i will not be perfect and their are many things that i will fail at, but i believe God’s grace is sufficient.

          • Lobanz D’Grate


            “Now, we see through a glass darkly.” We are not expected to have a perfect understanding of things. In fact, it is expected that we do not.

            But “let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind”. We ARE held accountable to our own conscience, though, as imperfect as it may be.

            But, it is to strive, to “press toward the mark”, to “feel after Him” that is the primary thing. Therein lies saving faith and not in the perfection of either our understanding or our actions.

            Keep striving!

            — Lobanz

        • Gladys1071

          by the way women having to work is NOT figment of the culture, it is called reality, you may not like it, but that is the way it is now. We have to live within this culture and survive, we cannot go backwards to another time.

      • Ann Morgan

        Yeah… the problem with the sobs about birth control not being in the bible, is that certain conditions OTHER than birth control have also changed. Mainly, men are no longer bashing in the heads of other men on a continual basis, and we no longer have an infant mortality rate of 80%.

        If the forced birthers are willing to kill/castrate a large number of the male population and deny ALL medical care (including modern sanition and running water) to children under 5 to bring our infant mortality rate back up to 80%, then maybe we can discuss the desirability of women popping out endless streams of babies. If not, then their sobs are as ludicrous as someone claiming we should eat as many calories at once as cavemen, when we don’t expend nearly as many calories as they had to, to obtain the food in the first place.

        • Gladys1071

          I know that is what I was trying to convey. We do lots of things differently now, and their is not the necessity to have as many children as then. It was beneficial to have many children then. As much as I am a Christian, I know that the bible was written at a certain time and some things cannot be transferred to our time. You analogy of calories is correct.

          • Lobanz D’Grate

            I do realize that things are different now. That times have changed. That many ideas from the Bible that “made sense” in the older, low-tech, agrarian world, don’t seem to “make sense” in the modern context. E.g., in the current high-tech society, children are more of a liability, but in lower-tech societies they are more of an asset, etc. But the real question is, which is more correct, the modern way, or the older way? By “correct” I mean the way the Creator intended for us to live. And how do we even know what “correct” is? Is “correct” judged only by practicalities like longer life span, lower infant mortality rate, higher education, better health care, greater comfort, convenience, standard of living? Do these things automatically equate to “progress”? Are there any enduring principles that are true even though they seem to be irrelevant in the modern world? Are children really an asset or not? Is the modern man actually cursed “that hath his quiver full of them”? Is it possible that it is the modern world that is off the rails?

            — Lobanz

          • Gladys1071

            to answer your question ” i don’t know” I don’t think this is a right or wrong dichotomy. I don’t think God is concerned with how many children we have or don’t have. I think that all we can do is seek God in prayer and do the best we can with the knowledge we do have. I think God judges our heart and that is what matters more in my opinion. I don’t think God is surprised or shocked by the fact that we have birth control, electricity, internet, if God knows the beginning and the end, he knew how man would live in these modern times. I just don’t worry about it, and i trust God will judge me fairly knowing that i had no choice to be born in this time and that i am a flawed/imperfect human being, and that their are just no simple straight answers to everything.

          • Lobanz D’Grate

            OK. I understand. I can empathize.

            There ARE answers though. I have sought them most of my life. And they are satisfying, but unexpectedly bitter.

            And you’re right. We can’t go back. For example, I have a lot of respect for the lifestyle of the Amish, but they could not continue to exist if they weren’t in a nation with high-tech fighter jets and laser guided bombs. Pandora’s box has already been opened and we can’t put all the genies back in the bottle.

            Just remember that the Bible doesn’t paint a picture of a world that gets better and better before the Lord finally returns. Rather, it says that “evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse, deceiving, and being deceived”. At some point we will have to stop riding this downward spiral.

            — Lobanz

          • Gladys1071

            The problem is not progress, the problem is us, sinful humanity, whether it be in ancient times or modern times, human beings are flawed, even the Amish are sinful and their is sin that goes in their community, as long as we are in these bodies, we will not be perfect in our conduct and our thinking and our choices. God knows this about this that is why i trust he will judge us fairly, taking into account our flawed humanity. Being religious does not change that, only until we shed this sinful flesh and our glorified, we will see clearly. So i live the best i can and wait until i see Jesus face to face.

          • Lobanz D’Grate

            Thank you for a good conversation.

            I wish you well.

            — Lobanz

          • Gladys1071

            You ask whether children are an asst or a liability? It depends, for some parents, their children are an asset. For the child that grows up to be a criminal that ruins it’s parent’s lives, a liability i would assume. You want standard certainty of a correct view, in my opinion it depends on the situation. I know that you want absolute inmutable correct views, you want “certainty” of doing what is right, i am ok with not knowing all correct answers, and having to figure it out in a manner of speaking, after all God did give us a brain and reason to think things through. I am a pragmatic person so for me it is easier to live with the uncertainty of not knowing all the right answers.

          • Ann Morgan

            ** But the real question is, which is more correct, the modern way, or the older way? By “correct” I mean the way the Creator intended for us to live. And how do we even know what “correct” is? Is “correct” judged only by practicalities like longer life span, lower infant mortality rate, higher education, better health care, greater comfort, convenience, standard of living?**

            Let me put it this way. It’s debatable which is ‘correct’ or not. But if you want to go with the ‘older way’, then you must go the ‘older way’ 100%. That means firstly killing or castrating a large percentage of the male population, and secondly, denying all infants and children under a certain age all modern medical care and sanitation in order to bring their mortality rate up to 80%. Do not tell me you want the ‘older way’ for popping out endless streams of babies, but also want the ‘modern way’ of all men being allowed to reproduce and most infants surviving. I won’t play two sided games like that.

          • Ann Morgan

            Your question is rather like asking – is it better to live in a cold climate or a warm climate?

            That’s debatable, there are advantages to each. But I do know this – you better not live in a cold climate and wear the same clothes you wore in the warm climate or vice versa.

          • Wren1

            You chose a myth to live by, a personal choice and your right. Why do you oppose a woman exercising her free will to not be a breeder?

          • Gina Dalfonzo

            Please don’t use terms like “breeder” here, Wren1. They’re demeaning and thus go against our comment policy. Thank you.

          • Wren1

            OK subservient slave to reproduction

          • Gina Dalfonzo

            I think you’re probably aware that that’s demeaning as well. Suppose you try to speak of people who live differently from you with a modicum of respect.

          • Ann Morgan

            Gladys, I was thinking over the behavior of the forced birthers today, and I now think I know what is going on with many of them. They are addicts. To their fetal fantasies.

            To understand this, you must understand the human mind (which forced birthers are unable to do, since their fetal fantasies preclude even acknowledging the existence of the mind, must less how it works.)

            The human mind has several things ‘hardwired’ into it. A good example is the ability to recognize ‘faces’, which is hardwired into us to such an extreme extent that we see ‘faces’ where there actually are not any real ‘faces’. You can test this on yourself. Go look at some tiles or wall panelling with a random, mottled pattern. You will quickly see ‘faces’. There are no faces. You mind is just hardwired to perceive them.

            Anyway, addictions of a behavioral sort (vs chemical sort) occur largely because the brain is overloaded by an extreme version of behaviors that it is hardwired to feel pleasure at engaging in. By extreme I mean that the addictive behavior is extreme in the sense that an extreme quality or quanity or variety of the behavior that we evolved to feel pleasure at is what is addicted to. For instance, addiction to food – we now have far more and better tasting food available far more easily than existed in the stone age. Addiction to gambling, which appeals to random intermittent rewards that were what was needed to keep cavemen hunting animals. Addiction to porn, which offers greater variety of photoshopped models than ever existed before.

            The fetal fantasy falls into this category. One of the things our brain is hardwired to do is to recognize certain proportions of face and body as ‘cute’. The reason why, is that these are the proportions of face and body that happen to exist in infant humans (and also infant animals). Our brain is hardwired to regard these proportions as ‘cute’ so that we will want to take care of our young. And btw, if our infants looked different, say they looked like giant oranges, our brains would then have evolved to regard round orange things as ‘cute’, rather than things with small bodies, small facial features, and big heads.

            This hardwiring of the brain to recognize certain proportions of face and body as ‘cute’ is what causes the addiction to the fetal fantasy. The fetus has these proportions to an even greater degree than a newbown. So just as internet porn offers ‘extreme super sex’ and modern restaurants offer ‘extreme super food’, picture of the fetus are interpretted by the brain as ‘extreme SUPER CUTE BABY’.

            Thus the addiction. Never mind that this is as inappropriate as overeating or constantly gambling. Like any addict, they must satisfy their addiction at all costs. They are basically having what amounts to a psychological sexual love affair with the behavioral object of their addiction. They will make anyone suffer anything, in order to satisfy their addiction. And like all addicts, they will come up with any excuse to satisfy their addiction, instantly change the excuses if some flaw in them is discovered, and become verbally or physically abusive to anyone who threatens to deny them either their addiction, or the means of obtaining it. Picture a heroin addict throwing a tantrum when the family member he is accustomed from stealing from hides their money someplace, and you will understand the frequent verbal tantrums of the forced birthers.

            And of course, as soon as they get their ‘fix’, in this case the climatic moment of the cute little head popping out, they instantly lose interest in the matter, no longer care about the infant that they claimed to have this great overwhelming compassion for only a few minutes earlier, and focus all their attention on the next ‘fix’, the next fetus-to-be in line.

  • Of course those who are infertile, or those raised in a family with a pattern of generations of emotional abuse, are just as disobedient to the “divine command” as those mentioned in the article. Of course God wouldn’t tell a couple that they should care for children in other ways.


  • RoseShoafstallYoung

    Thanks for posting this article…and I can agree whole heartedly that animals are not ‘fur babies’. Animals are pets, and in no way can replace a child. With that said, I think it’s better for some to stick with animals because parenting is very hard work, and it literally never ends until you or God forbid, your child dies before you. Parenting is self-less, petting a dog or a cat is self-ish…(I have hyphenated these two words on purpose)…WE like how it makes us feel. Let’s be honest, the animal probably likes it too but WE pet animals for self enjoyment. Having a child is so much more than just petting, feeding, and vaccinating an animal. It’s 24/7 for 18-22 years and after that, you are on call. I LOVE being a parent but it’s probably a very good thing that I didn’t know just how hard it would be when we decided to have a baby.

  • Gladys1071

    I don’t know why anyone is worried about this, their are still plenty of people having kids to make up for the ones that don’t. Hate to say it but most people don’t put much thought into having kids and most of the time they are unplanned. We are not in any danger of going extinct, their will still be plenty of unplanned pregnancies to keep the species going. This is just fear mongering for no reason.

  • Alice Cheshire

    You’re very brave to write this. People who think cats are people are some of the meanest people out there. You can’t insult them by pointing out it’s a cat, not a person. They don’t care. So I applaud your bravery for this article.